Brad's dictaphone.

Remember: This is merely a rehearsal. A rehearsal.... I hope....
Ehh... Even though it is only a rehearsal: Don't let them hear you... Be verrrrry quiet!
Errr, Dave, I don't think you should be bleeding all over, like you do.... Go un-bleed! It's not too good of an idea to bleed with ZOMBIES around.
D-D-Dave? A-Are you a-alright? Dave?
Lucy, get away from dave. NOW.
OH MY GOD!
DAVE!
ARGH!!! STOP BITING LUCY, DAVE!
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
OH MY GOD! I CAN SEE HER INTESTINES!
COME ON LISA, WE NEED TO GET OUT OF HERE!
SHOOT THE HEADS!!! OH MY GOD SHOOT THE HEADS!!!
(Yes, was just waiting for an excuse to use it.)
AAAAARRRGHHHH!
Look! A house! We might be saved!
Lisa? Oh my god...... Is that.... Your parents?
GET AWAY FROM THEM!
They are not your parents anymore!
NOW RUN INTO THAT HOUSE!
I'm afraid we're not in Kansas anymore... Heh.....
Wait... Did you leave the door open? Oh my god...
Oh my god oh my god oh my god.....
If I'm sure this was just a rehearsal? NO! Not anymore!
Lisa.
Behind you.
ARGHHHH!! NO!!! RUN LISA!!!
I got it!
HOT DAMN HE BIT ME!!!
RUN LISA!
Befo.. B.. B...... Braaaaaiiiiinnnsssss......
Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhgaaaaagaaaaa...