Anal probing and other necessities.

We all know aliens are supposedly probing the people they supposedly abduct.
But here is my theory.
The farmer (there is always a farmer in the receiving end-story) got reeaally fucking drunk one evening, presented to hit on a man, a trucker at that (because they always have long nasty fatty hair), took him home to his respective house, managed to accidentally shoot his dog, and then proceeded to have rough sex with the trucker.
The farmer fell asleep and snored like someone flew through the atmosphere, the trucker couldn't sleep because of it, so he got into his truck with loads of flashy lights on it, and drove off.

I found this to be a suiting descriptive picture. Only that the trucker was really really hairy and nasty and had one of them weird moustaches.
The farmer didn't end up with a bun in the oven, however, because he is a man. So don't be silly.

No. If aliens wanted to see what humans were like on the inside, they would probably grab a homeless person and killed him and done an autopsy on him. No way they would leave them alive. That is just silly.
And I believe if aliens were to come here, they would first of all check out how humanity were ready to cope with them "stopping by their planet, casual-like" and so on and so on. No alien is stupid enough to just go take a random farmer and stick a thing in his butt and say "Hey dude, I took a liking to your arse, now come with me, I will take you with me to my home planet, where fucking E.T. lives in fucking happiness!"
No!
Nobody in this fucking universe is that fucking stupid!

Wait.. I know of a certain male specimen that could be so fucking dim, and possibly also paler than they portray aliens, and a heckofalot more "shady".. *snort*... HAHAHA!! No that was a joke. A big fat joke. Like him. If by shady one mean "fucking creepy" then there you got him...
Oooohh.. That coward deserves to be probed so hard......

Anyway, my point is, before I digressed (though not that horribly.. He looks like an alien..), that if aliens visit Earth, there is no way they would just stand over a city for ever like in District 9, I think they would try and locate a leader and blast them to death with their fancy plasma guns.... Ohh hoho yes...
And naturally crown me king. Because that is the logical thing to do.

Metamorphosis One

Oh my god. Oh my fucking god!
This is a great great great song by Phillip Glass called Metamorphosis One.
I first heard it on Battlestar Galactica, and it blew my mind.
Have a listen. It is magnificent!

Green guys and people in condom suits.

Superman is a really really really bad superhero.
How can you like a guy that can do EVERYTHING.
Fine, OK, I can see why some people might like that, but I think it's silly.
It's ridiculous even.
- He can fly
- Laser vision
- Invulnerable
- X-ray vision
- Super strength
- Super breath
- Heightened Senses
- Eidetic Memory
- Speed

What is not on that bloody list!?

And what is keeping him from taking over the earth? Why isn't he? WHY!? TELL ME WHY!!!!!

Oh, and no "goodly good" explanation, please. Because that is ridiculous. Who has that much power and is only goodly-good. They must have some sort of urge to conquer something. Seriously.

With great power comes great urge to rule. 

Yes.

I'm sure, if superman was real, he would be a self-proclaimed emperor and use all the weak earthlings as slaves to extract all the known resources possible and shipped them to his home planet, that they were stupid enough to blow up, so probably make another "home planet" here and use people for whatever they like. To put it this way, Lois Lane would not be an investigating-journalist any more :P

Too far?

OK. I apologize for the last statement.

Oooo.. Look at me! I'm mr. Strongandinvincibe!
I look fabulous in my condom suit that shows all my perdy muscles and wotsits!

Anyway, Superman is fucking ridiculous. Give me an awesome superhero like a scrawny fucking nerd learning he can control people, or something! Someone with fucking flaws!

Theories of ... Stuff.

I have a theory.

Loud music is really good for the soul.

I mean so loud it's waking up the neighbours and you can shout and scream as falsely as you like without anyone noticing, and trying to scream the way Brody Dalle does.....

Fuck, that lady's got an awesome voice.

I came across a hilarious sentence the other day:

Friends are like potatoes, when you eat them, they die.

So flipping epic!

Tattoo my head tattoo my feet!

Peace. 

Busy busy busy!

Busy obsessing over TNT. Oh, TNT, where art thou! I have even made a poem over how much I need you!
I call it: Ode to TNT.

Ode to TNT...

O TNT, Thy beautiful boon,
Thy reputation loom
in a great big boom.
soon there will be doom!

Thine fuse is ignited and crackles
The villages burn, and I cackle,
O Thy removed me from my shackle!
For Thou, I will wrestle and tackle!


The  pebbles raining down after Thy tale,
is filling my body with joy, but O, my heart bewail!
O woe is me!
Will I cease without Thee?

O TNT what betideth Thee!
What is here, the longing more than other,
for Thy fuse is no longer,
O call upon me! My TNT!

 The end.

Death and decay

That could be a Goth's blog title.
Heh heh...

Anyway, a little while ago the Minecraft server DIED! Oh the horror!
It just wouldn't live any more. So I would like to take a second to remember all the good times we had on it. And as I am spreading these ashes...

OK fuck that. That was just depressing.
We got a new server now, with mountains and other lovely stuff. Atlantis is involved. Dare I speak any further?
Atlantis is so incredibly awesome...
Oh and Eden and a Light-mountain-town and Dovregubben's Hall is there too! :)
It's gonna be a cool new server I believe.

Anyway:

Power.

Look at that instead. And be happy. Be joyous and prosper. Acknowledge this as your own philosophy!

YEAH!

Oh, and I was accepted at Swansea Metropolitan University, so now I will soon conquer Wales as well.
Joy and happiness and shit.